Turned out the number belongs to one of my very few friends from way back then. And when I said way back then, I'm talking like since I got here in Canada. And that's around 2002, I believe. We had great times together, and bad. But mostly good. I'd like to think that I'm a nice person and I do my best to respect everyone even at times when they probably don't even deserve it. I just feel like it's much easier to be kind than be rude and inconsiderate. But that's just me. I'm not saying that I am perfect. After all, I am only human. I have my fair share of terrible offenses here and there. And I'm not ashamed to admit them. But overall, I just really do my best to be a nice person.
We've been through quite a bit. Considering the type of person I am, it's quite something when I call someone a 'friend'. I want the term to be special in it's rightful way. A lot of times, people would throw terms and expressions just like that without thinking how much they're diminishing the real value of them. They'd call everyone friends when in reality, they don't even talk much nor really care for that person. They would say they're starving when the truth of the matter is that they are not. It's a slap in the face to those who are really starving and have not eaten in days. I don't do that. But I don't frown upon others for doing it. People would ask how others are. But honestly speaking, I feel like most of the time they don't really give a crap if you're good or bad. They have their own life to worry about and it doesn't really matter if you're good or bad. Long story short, I got derailed there, this guy is someone I treated as a friend. Someone I could trust. But it all changed after an event that I prefer not to talk about in this entry.
(James, me and Jesus. I was a bit drunk. Can you tell?)
He asked how I was. And I gave him an honest answer, I said I don't know. Not really sure if I'm good or bad. I know I'm not good. But at the same time, I'm not doing terrible either. Then I asked him how he was and I hoped that he would give me a positive answer. And he did. Good for him. Coz he's a nice guy. Just a bit unusual at times in terms of his actions and principles in life. But he's not a bad person. And so I know he deserves to have a nice life. He wanted us to go to the Jazz Fest if I was interested. I am not in any way attracted to the idea. So I told him I'd call him back to let him know. Besides, I'd rather study and train than watch the Jazz Fest. Unless it's with a girl! Oooooo yeeeeee~ Hahahahahahah!!! That'd be nice.
Truth be told, I'm not sure if I really want to see him again. I choose my friends wisely. So picky that I have so many acquaintances, few brothers and even fewer friends. I have always been about quality over quantity. The first sight of bad news I see in someone, I distance myself immediately and it will show. After all, I'm not a very good liar. I'd stop talking to you and probably avoid you if I don't like you. But for old time's sake, I'll come meet up with him one of these days. I can't trust him anymore, however.
I have my own hidden agendas as well. Things and plans I'm still contemplating on. In the end, he could be of use to me. But a part of me tells me that it's not right to use people. And I know that for a fact. But for some reason I have this urge deep within me to make sure I could utilize him to my advantage. I suppose that's the ninja in me speaking. But Aron's conscience still lingers there. I'll figure this out and make a decision. Sooner or later.
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